Monday, September 10, 2012

7 Days of Sex (Pregnancy Edition): Day One

As shameful as this may be to admit, seven days of sex would of seemed laughable four years ago.  Not because it wasn't possible, but because it wouldn't have seemed like much of a challenge. However, at 24 years old and 7 months pregnant, I am forced to realize my sex life at 20 years old is a far cry from my present one.

When my husband and I started dating, we actually waited to have sex.  I was no virgin, nor was I waiting for marriage, but I wanted to see where waiting would get me.  2 years later, it got me a ring, a pregnant belly, and a "home" in country Kentucky.

Unfortunately, marrying someone in the military meant we never really got into a rhythm sexually when we were married.  While my husband is kind enough not to admit it publicly, I know I have been hot and cold when it comes to sex with him.  That is mostly driven by insecurity.

For friends and maybe even a few past sexual partners, that may come as a shock.  But for me having sex with a guy who I didn't know anything about his past was easier than having sex with my husband.  Because I never really felt like I had to live up to anything.

Oh, and don't even get me started on my body issues.(sigh).

Don't get me wrong, I have had my fair share of awkward nights with past bed mates but that was simply because they were a disappointment from the moment the condom was in place.  But I always envisioned myself as this lioness type of woman in the bedroom when it came to my future husband.

I was wrong.

Most women have heard the saying, "What you won't do for your man, another woman will."  That is something that lingers in the back of my head at all times.  While I don't believe my husband will cheat, I do feel bad that I don't fulfill him in that aspect of our marriage.

Yes, that is embarrassing to admit, it is unfortunately the truth.

As we approach our one year anniversary, I am starting to realize more and more how important sex is in a marriage.  I can't tell you how many times sex has come up in our arguments and in the most random of ways.  Needless to say, my first trimester of pregnancy did not help the situation.

So to sum up what could be a long(er) introduction, I asked my husband if he would want to try this whole 7 days of sex experiment.  He was ready to go in the car, where I told him.  However, sex in the car is not as appealing as it was when I was 19 (and it wasn't even appealing then).

Today is day one, which actually should of been two days ago, and we are already off to a bumpy start.  I was ready to go earlier today but he was working on his bike.  As I look at the clock, I realize it is getting late and both of us are drained.  So wish me luck and I will keep you posted tomorrow:-)

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